Book Group Discussion Questions
1. Why isn’t Kim more forthcoming with family, friends, and lawyer about the abuse she has endured? Is this similar or different than Courtney’s refusal to discuss what happened at her previous job? Is this the stigma that victims often describe, or is it something else? At one point, Kim muses about how much easier it is to speak out with strangers (for example, the man at the phone booth in the park) than stand up to her husband. Why do you think she feels this way? Is this feeling shared by all of us to some extent, or is it unique to situations where abuse is present?
2. Kim is very close to her talented older sister Karen. Did Kim grow up "in her shadow" or not? Did her turn away from music have to do with avoiding competition or was that just a blind? How did these two young women who are in so many ways so similar–almost twins–end up having such divergent experiences of love and marriage, family and career, once they became adults?
3. Larry and Kim come from very different families. How do these family dynamics play into their relationship? In a few places, Kim reflects on what might have happened to Larry if she had stood up to him in the beginning. To what extent are victims responsible for their abuse? Is the "enabler" theory valid or just bunk? Why was it so important to Larry to control Kim, and do you think he had the potential to change if the dynamic imbalance had been addressed before marriage and family were added to the relationship picture? Is it significant that the child, Nathan, is a boy? Do you think Larry’s behavior towards the baby would have been different if Nathan had been a girl?
4. Dreams are often called windows into the soul. During the course of the book, Kim describes several dreams. Discuss how these dreams foreshadow or explain the events and circumstances in her life.
5. On paper, Forrest seems like the “perfect choice.” Why does Kim turn him down? Each of the men that Kim is involved with after her separation is completely different. Is this significant? What is it about each of them that she is drawn to? Is this evidence that she has
compartmentalized the many different aspects of her personality, or something else entirely?
6. Our first encounter with Bobbie MacLean, at the breakfast table in Hubbard Woods, is a silent one, as she responds to Kim’s remark by placing a finger on the newspaper weather report. Did Kim "lose her voice" in part because she grew up in such a quiet household? Did this quality of reservation contribute to Kim’s problems, or stand her in good stead during her trials, or, perhaps, both? What other qualities of character does Bobbie possess that Kim shares without realizing? Again, do these qualities serve to help or hinder Kim along the way, and if so, how, and to what degree? To what degree is Bobbie aware of her own reserves of inner strength, and is this degree of self-awareness, besides the strength itself, yet something further she and her daughter have in common?
7. In music, the rests are just as important as the notes. Find the places in the book that you felt were real turning points in the story. How many of these are bracketed by silences, and how does this add to the emotional impact for you?
8. What does Kim mean when she talks about going "beyond the evergreens?" Has she truly been sheltered by affluence, or does her naivete stem from other sources, the psychological issues she has to work through being ones that can occur in any family?
9. The difficulty in obtaining justice is an underlying theme in this book. Discuss this. At the end, when the divorce is finally granted, do you feel that justice has been served?